Tuesday, January 03, 2006

My role in a family drama

Today the instant I walked into the house from work, our eldest, and most dramatic, loverly daughter said, "Mom LuLu(the names have been changed to protect the innocent) has invited me to go to the movies with her tonight."

I replied in my most haggard voice, "I don't think tonight is a good night. The movie won't start til at least 7pm and you would be out until 9pm and tomorrow is a school day. You just got off a long break, lets do it another night."

Oh my 'lard', you would have thought I told her she could never breathe again or something. The wailings that came out of that child's mouth were unsurpassed to this point in her young life. I retreated to my bedroom and looked at Joe, who was blogging (a RIVETING POST nonetheless...Jamie please stay calm) and said, "What on earth is that about?" He advised that LuLu was supposedly moving, and he being the sensitive "girl dad" that he is suggested I go offer to let her talk about it. Just about that time she came busting in the room asking for the movie listings. After a little bit -o- sass on her part and a little bit -o -yellin on Joe's part she retreated and gave up.

I knew she was stewing about something more than going to the movies, probably about losing her friend, so I went to her very sweetly and said, "Honey is there something you need to talk about? Is something going on with Leslie? Is she moving?"

Big tears welled up in her eyes and she nodded. "When? I asked

"Sniff....next year." she said.

I used a lot of restraint here. I suggested that she had a lot of time to spend with LuLu before she left and we could plan some "special time" with her real soon.

Am I over-reacting here or was that a little bit much? I remember how "big" things seemed when I was her age . What joy awaits us as she enters puberty!!


  1. well, you messed up right there toward the end, and spurted out this kids real name (lulu)

    i'm having some drama right now, with mr whiney pants over here taking an hour to write 25 words, all because i won't help him. i already put them into alphabetical order, and by gosh he can do the dang rest, but he is putting on the biggest show of his life. i HATE IT.

    but no, you did the right thing. you can't say no, and then go back on it, or they will do their little show every time. and it will get worse when she's a teenager. adams daughter has always been like that, they ask a question, they already know what sort of answer they want, but when they hear the wrong answer, they are prepared for a huge fight. so here's the deal.

    when she bombards you right away when you come in the door, just tell her, i'm going to talk to your dad first, and see what he told you. and if you go and talk to him, and he had already told her no, then she's in trouble right there, cause it should be taboo for her to try and get the other parent if she doesn't like the first one's answer. or if he had told her yes, then you would have to retract your no, and you look like the bad guy.

    you gotta be a team, these girls are tough. and it's going to get tougher, so you need to be prepared. never answer them until you check with the other parent first. even if they call you at work, ask them to put him on the phone. when they figure out you guys are working as a team, it will alleviate a lot of these fits that are getting thrown. back each other up.

    i could go on for hours, but there is someone here that i'm going to throw through the window.

  2. i'm not sure how old your daughter is but at any age it is reasonable to expect a certain amount of drama. :)


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